Something I felt like writing.

I feel empty.

As if emotions don't really exist anymore.

Heartaches.

The swelling sensation you get when you know you can't take it any longer. Where you feel like you're suffocating and collapsing. Your heart just tells you to shut down and heave heavily for air.

The cliched feeling you get what your find your eyes brimming with tears. 

You tell yourself that you're not going to cry, but you fail to comply. It's a never ending battle with your heart. All you can do is to swallow your sorrow and misery into a pitiful sob.

I stepped onto the dock as i was welcomed into the wind's gentle embrace. The wind caressed my face with its sharp stinging coolness. I wrapped my arms around myself as i close my eyes. I know that this is what you have always wanted... I managed to choke out in between my endless stream of tears. And I'm going to give it to you.

Those will be my last words as i toss myself into the freezing cold ocean. The illusion of orange and red streaks floating across the waves now luring me to drown inside it's firm grasp. 

Maybe, just maybe I'm not ready yet.

And that is when I saw you floating across the ocean in your ship screaming for my name, looking aimlessly for a familiar silhouette that you've left at the same place 3 years ago.

You came back.

When you're still alive, you're still in a war.

But this time, you're battling against yourself.