Why Vampires Suck?

Okay, this post is practically MADE for me to blurt out all of my thoughts about this. But i have to admit, i used to be a fan of Twilight. USED to. I loved the book before anyone found out about it or started reading it. After it was discovered, it became one of THE most overrated books EVER. It was repetitively chanted like mantra about how it rocks, how Edward is this or how Jacob is that. But to be honest, who really gives a shit whether you're on Team Edward or Team Jacob? I'm on Buffy the Vampire Slayer's team fosho.

Well, leaving the fictional vampires - that Stephenie Meyer invented - aside, let's talk about Vampires in General.

Why should we hate them?
Well, because they could pounce onto us and drain every bit of blood out of us whenever they want! Sure, they might have self control and all that shizz but puh-lease, who would restrain themselves from obtaining their precious food when they're all around you? Plus, it's ridiculously hard to kill them if they were to attempt to suck the life out of you, considering that they're strong and all that. Garlic and crosses wouldn't work. I mean, why would it? Being christian while smelling like garlic all the time wouldn't be ideal to kill a bloody vampire. Their venomous fangs would've probably landed on you before you even shine your almighty cross or shower garlic perfume on them.

Vampires are bums too. They live in a coffin and hell knows how you can actually clean one? Plus, the coffin might be a thousand years old for all i care and they'll be sleeping in it. They're sleeping in dust. I don't think that they are even bothered by all the dust surrounding them! Dirty, dirty scumbags are what they are! I bet that they're too busy sucking our warm metallic-tasting blood then to even bother about their personal hygiene. ugh!

Plus, what's so hot about looking pale all of the time?
Being tanned looks healthy! It makes you look like you're active and athletic! (if you have a hot bod of course) Being pale is just....weird. It makes you look as if you're on drugs and never saw the sun in your entire life. But as far as i'm concerned, most girls are TRYING to make themselves look paler, which in my opinion is EXTREMELY STUPID. I mean, why bother wasting your money on buying skin products that will make you look like a fool? Plus, it's wasting time AND money. You waste your money on buying the products, and you waste your time while waiting for the skin product to actually work! Congratulations! You've achieved the medal for being the dumbest person alive!
//claps and cheers.

Now we shall include the stupidity of how Stephenie Meyer portrayed her vamps!
The world equation for the creation of Twilight.

Stephenie Meyer + Drugs = Twilight

Pretty harsh. Myeh.
It'd be stupid of me to say that i've nothing against Twilight, because, well, i DO.

She made vampires sparkle. SPARKLE.
Most creative ideas come by thinking outside the box, but where in the WORLD did she get the idea that vampires would sparkle?! Diamonds sparkle, not vampires. Pop. There you go. Sorry for bursting your bloody bubble.
I'm sorry for telling you that vampires are not tinkerbell wannabes.
I mean, there's even a facebook group for it :
He doesn't bite people, and he sparkles. Face it, Edward Cullen is a fairy.

Girls, tell me how is he hot again? :/

Okay that's pretty much what i needed to pointed out from Twilight. Sparkle for goodness sake. How ridiculous!

Conclusion: I hate vampires.